Letting Go

Am I aware that it’s currently 4:18 AM as I’m writing this? Absolutely. Am I also aware that most of my best writing and thoughts come to me early in the morning like this? Again, absolutely.  

So, for those of you who don’t know, last Thursday, I was involved in a car crash. I had lunch with my pastor that day and was taking him back to his office at the church when suddenly, a lady blew a stop sign off of one of the side roads, causing me to run straight into her. My car was pretty heavily damaged on the front end, unfortunately. Luckily, I was physically OK, and so was my pastor, who was in the passenger seat. The car can be replaced, but we can’t, so I was thankful neither of us was hurt. I have no clue yet whether they’ll total it or just fix it, but over the course of this last week since the accident, I’ve spent a lot of time worrying. Worrying about finding a new car, worrying about how I’m going to get back to school, and worrying about what they are going to do with my car and how I am going to survive without a car while they got the insurance figured out. None of these things are unrealistic to worry about, and I honestly feel like most are normal thoughts. 

The question I find myself asking, though, is Why? Why should I be so worried about these things? You see, I serve a God who has a master plan for my life, and when I worry, it’s because I start to doubt his plan. It was clearly God’s plan that we were in my car because originally, I was going to meet my pastor at The Church, and we were going to take his car, but due to my time commitments, I ended up just meeting him at Subway instead. If we had been in his Honda Civic and ran into that lady the same way we did in my SUV, we both would have been a LOT more physically damaged, but luckily, we were in my car, and neither one of us was hurt. That right there is pure evidence that God has such an amazing plan for me and that I just need to trust him. I think so often, when things like this happen, it can be hard for us to let go of control of the situation. We feel things that aren’t our fault really are and that we could have done things differently, but that’s not reality; that’s just us wanting to have control. 

Is there anything I could have physically done to avoid this? No. Was this my fault in any way, shape, or form? No. Am I still living, breathing, and walking? Absolutely. I find so much comfort in Micah 6:8 in my time of worry. Micach 6:8 says, “He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act Justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God”. God does so much for us yet ask so little in return. He protected me during the crash and will protect me in the future, so why should I worry? Short answer: I shouldn’t. God has a plan for each and every one of us, and I just need to let go of control and surrender to his plan because that brings such a sense of peace that surpasses all understanding. 

Hope you all have an amazing rest of your week!

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